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Should Cara Attend?

One of the questions we faced leading up the guardianship hearing was whether or not Cara should attend.

So, I argued with myself (and sought input).


1. Why should she go? She doesn't understand what is going on.

2. But it would be good experience for her even if she doesn't completely understand. Exposure to a new situation.

3. But what if she melts down. (Oh boy! That was a big one!)

4. And what if going to court scares her.

5. But you did tell her that you (plural) would be going downtown and put it on the calendar.

6. How about a social story?


Noooooo, not another social story!!!!!


So, I finally decided to ask Cara. After all, even if she doesn't understand what is going on, she can tell me if she wants to go downtown or to school. She quickly chose school. No desire to go downtown. I took her to the calendar and had her watch me take the tag off of the calendar and throw it away. Problem solved.


That was the decision. Cara went to school and we went to court.


Sometimes I think too hard about things and then realize that there is a simple solution. What would Cara care about? Simple - whether she was going to school or going someplace else. If we were taking the Newport Aquarium, then school might lose.


A good lesson to me of how Cara has grown up and while I am her mom, I am also her guardian. I need to be prepared to help her make the decisions she can make - instead of making all of them for her.



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